Be a Disciple Before a Disciple-Maker
We can’t really be intentional with helping our kids cultivate an authentic relationship with Jesus, unless we are cultivating one ourselves.
I previously shared what discipleship looks like in our own home; what it looks like to raise gospel fluent kids who love and follow Jesus. For our crew, it means doing more than simply taking them to church, memorizing scripture just because, or outsourcing their learning about God’s kingdom to others. It means discipling them in The Bigger Story and training them up in how the gospel permeates the crevices of our everyday lives.
But how do we – as parents – even begin to communicate that story and impart gospel fluency to young hearts and minds in a meaningful way?
- Know What the Gospel Means to YOU
As the parent, you are the model for your children in many different areas of life. If you are lacking in your own gospel identity and purpose, it will be challenging for you to establish a gospel-fluent environment for you kids to learn and grow in.
Go back to your own story. Where did you come from and where were you heading? What took you to the foot of Jesus’ cross? Do you even recognize your utter need for Him? Are you constantly recalling what God has done for you because of Jesus’ blood? Who were you before Jesus, and who are you know because of Him? And … how do you see your life in light of God’s greater, redemptive narrative?
Apart from Christ, we are literally nothing and deserve nothing (except for death). But we were counted worthy enough to be restored to God. Does that stir you enough to live with gospel-purpose?!
Taking the time to reflect on the gospel and what it means to you – not just once, but often – is central in being able to raise you children to do the same.
- Spend Time in God’s Word
Duh.
Just as you are the primary example, you are also the main source of biblical wisdom for your kids (especially if they are not reading yet!). How can you be their well, if you are dry? How can you give them a taste of the author of The Bigger Story if you are not communing with Him yourself?
I know opening up God’s word can be challenging. I used to be in a place where I could not make it a priority in my life. There were excuses like not enough time or just not feeling up to it (hello, tired moms of littles!). As a baby Christian, I didn’t even know where to start and when I tried, I couldn’t understand. And, of course, I would feel guilty because I knew this is what “good” Christians should do.
But, you know what? You make time for things you value. You prioritize things that are important to you. Do you truly value what God has done for you enough that it has given you an insatiable hunger for His word?
Honestly, I didn’t initially, especially as a young mom. Trying to raise miniature-sized sinners took me out often. I’d gravitated first to easy, temporary fixes: wine, a night out with friends, me time, shopping. I mean, there is a place for practical self-care that gives us present joys to keep us plugging along. We are finite human beings, after all. But too often, we reach for the chocolate before we reach for Christ.
It wasn’t until I did the “hard” work of slowing down enough to sit and be still, and open up my bible, that I was able to experience the absolute treasures God’s word offers. Truths that ministered to me more deeply and longer than the “easy joys” we are naturally inclined to consume first. The more I gobbled up the gems found in scripture, the more my appetite grew for it. It really is living water and bread for life.
- Live it Out with Others, Especially the Hard Ones
The gospel – if it means something to you – should literally change your life. It should impact how you live in community with others, from our spouses and our children, to neighbors and co-workers, and even to our enemies. We are not meant to be monks, growing more perfect in isolatation. In fact, our sanctification happens often through our relationships with other sinners!
When God created mankind, He did something different with us. All other creation was simply spoken into existence. But humans? God said, “Let us make man in our image,” took the time to form Adam, and then breathed life into him. How amazing is that?!
We were set apart from the rest of creation. While nature and animals point to God’s awesomeness, we actually bear His image. So when you engage with others – no matter how messed up you think they are – you are looking at an image-bearer of Almighty God. By the way, this includes the person you see in the mirror.
Doesn’t that perspective humble you to a place of recognizing that we all are equally valuable in God’s eyes and His story? So, how can they be of any less value to you – an equal sinner?
Loving the unlovable is what the gospel really is, and through Jesus, we are given the power to do the same.